The Power of Words

Esau asked, "Haven't you reserved any blessing for me?" Isaac answered Esau, "I have made him lord over you and have made all his relatives his servants, and I have sustained him with grain and new wine. So what can I possibly do for you, my son?" Genesis 27:36-37

The Power of Words
By Rev. William Dohle

As I kid I remember chanting: "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me!"

You may have said that too. Perhaps in response to someone trying to bully you or make fun of you. Unfortunately, that statement is untrue.

Sticks and stones may break our bones...but our bones heal. Our bones can mend. We can go about with crutches and medicine and live our lives. Sticks and stones cannot touch our spirits. They can wound only the body. They do nothing to our soul. They do not stay with us forever. And they can be overcome.

But words...words are different weapons. Words, it seem, never leave us. We may have recovered from the fight, but we will never forget what was said of us or to us. Words have a way of coming back around. Of shaping our lives in ways we never expected or wanted.

Words are especially harmful to children. They say it takes a thousand compliments to equal one bad word spoken to your children. As parents, we shape the lives of our children with each and every word spoken. Speak words of compliment and praise and see them rise up and smile. Speak words of criticism and disappointment and watch them shrink back.

The power of words is seen from the beginning, when Jacob steals the blessing of his father, Isaac. Here in this story, we might wonder as Esau did: "Do you have only one blessing, my father? Bless me too, my father!"

Why doesn't Isaac bless Esau as well? Why does he end up cursing him? Why does he tell him: "You will live by the sword and you will serve your brother. But when you grow restless you will throw his yoke from off your neck."

Isaac knows his words have power. He's already mistakenly past on the blessing of God to his son, Jacob. Jacob will now become the heir of the promise of Abraham, not Esau. "May nations serve you and peoples bow down to you. Be lord over your brothers and may the sons of your mother bow down to you. May those who curse you be cursed and those who bless you be blessed." These words are the same words God spoke to Abraham, Jacob's grandfather.

So the only place left for Esau is to be a servant. A servant to the brother who received the blessing.

We might think how unfair this is to Esau. But we must also remember how often we follow in Isaac's tracks. How often we characterize our own children, pitting them against each other for just a little approval.

"You're the smart one..." "You're the pretty one..." "You're going to be the rich one!"

And each and every word we speak to them will be remembered. If we criticize them, they will feel the power of our words for years to come. If we abuse them, they will carry that hurt throughout their life. But if we praise them and find a place in this world for them and always give them our love no matter what they do, then they will carry those words around with them too.

For my part, I am thankful. Thankful that we have a loving and forgiving Father in heaven who can forgive us for the times we have wounded our children with our words. Thankful that that same God loves us no matter what our parents may or may not have said about us. And thankful that God always stays with us and never lets go. Just as, despite Isaac's blessing, he never let go of Esau.

Heavenly Father, your Word, Jesus Christ, speaks truth to us and tells us that, no matter what, we are loved and cherished by you. Speak your Word into our lives that it may drown out the noises around us and teach us that Word that we might speak life into the lives of others, for Jesus Sake, Amen.

Just Like Dad

That night the LORD appeared to him and said, "I am the God of your father Abraham. Do not be afraid for I am with you." Genesis 26:24

Just Like Dad
By Rev. William Dohle

My wife and I have a crazy game we play together as we look at our kids. It's called: Where does that come from?

I works like this. We see some quality in our children. Say the way my son messes up his room and just doesn't see it's dirty, and my wife will say to me: "That he got from his father!"

Or she sees the way my daughter collects things and can't seem to throw away anything. "That she gets from her father."

Or the way my middle son expects things to go his way and cries when they don't. "That he gets from his father."

It's fun to play, really. Fun when you realize how your children draw on the qualities of their parents as they act and react to the world around them.

And, of course, it's nothing new. The same could be said of Isaac in regards to his father. Isaac faced similiar situations as Abraham did and used many of the same tactics as well.

When up against the Philistines, Isaac said, "She's my sister" because he was afraid to say, "She is my wife." Just like his father Abraham did to his own mother on two separate occasions.

Isaac continues to do his fathers work, reopening the wells his father had dug and the Philistines had stopped, giving them the same names his father had given them too.

Isaac finds himself in a water dispute, just like his father Abraham. And just like Abraham, Isaac makes for himself an agreement with leader of the people, Abimelech, king of the Philistines.

But the biggest way that Isaac follows after his father is in God's eyes. For God doesn't see Isaac as a solo individual, but as the inheritor of the blessing. "I am the God of your Father...I will bless you and will increase the number of your descendants for the sake of my servant Abraham."

Indeed, Isaac is blessed BECAUSE of Abraham. Not because of anything he himself did to please God. God is faithful to Isaac because he was faithful to Abraham and because God's faithfulness lasts forever, Isaac enjoys the same blessings his father enjoyed by God.

We too are children of Abraham, inheritors of the promise. St. Paul writes of us, modern children of Abraham, "Understand then that those who believe are children of Abraham...So those who have faith are blessed along with Abraham, the man of faith."(Galatians 3:7,9)

We too are "just like our Dad" Abraham. We hold for ourselves the faith that is counted as righteousness. Faith in God who redeems us and sustains us and blesses us beyond imagining. We too can look at the stories of Scripture and find ourselves hidden within them because they are OUR stories. They are about OUR fathers and OUR brothers and OUR relatives. And we become as they are, "just like Dad", who is ultimately just like our Heavenly Dad, creator of heaven and earth.

For, in light of this, I can say. My oldest son is faithful...just like his Heavenly Dad. My middle son has great curiousity about the world...just like his Heavenly Dad. And my daughter is joyful...just like her Heavenly Dad!

How are you...and your children...reflections of your Father in Heaven?

Heavenly Father, thank you for the faith you planted in your servant Abraham. And thank you for adopting us into this family. May we share the faith of all your servants as we live our lives in service to you and to one another, through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Sibling Rivalry

Once when Jacob was cooking some stew, Esau came in from the open country, famished. He said to Jacob, "Quick, let me have some of that red stew! I'm famished."...Jacob replied, "First sell me your birthright." Genesis 25:30-31

Sibling Rivalry
By Rev. William Dohle

I can't believe it! I just can't believe it!

My little brother Samuel turned 30 this past week. The little boy who use to carry around his teddy bear everywhere he went is entering his 30's! Boy I feel old!

As I was congratulating him over the phone this past weekend, I thought back at the years we were growing up...and the rivalries that we had.

Samuel and I loved each other growing up. Or at least that's how I remember it. Talk to Samuel and he'll tell you stories of how I teased him as a kid. How he and my sister teamed up against me whenever our parents left me in charge. And how I would threaten them: "I'm gonna tell Mom!"

I remember those times too...vaguely...though my memory is selective in some areas. You see, I remember having good reason to tell mom and dad on them! After all, he was sooo annoying as a kid!

Sibling rivalry is common, I think, in most families. There's always at least a little element of it. Every sibling wants to be the favorite sibling. Every child wants that special attention. And the competition is on which one will win out over the rest. I saw it in my family growing up...and I see it my children now.

Of course that's nothing new. Sibling rivalries have been happening since time began. One of the most famous rivalries was between Esau and his brother, Jacob. These twins, born to Rebekah and Isaac, were fighting straight out of the womb. Their parents didn't help matters any. Strong Esau became the favorite of Isaac while timid Jacob became the favorite of Rebekah.

The two brothers culminated their rivalry in two incidents that changed their birthrights forever. The first happened when, in a fit of stupidity, Esau gave the birthright to Jacob for a bowl of stew. The second happened when their father was on his deathbed, about to give his blessing, and Jacob, with his mother's help, disguised himself as his brother, Esau to steal the blessing.

Talk about sibling rivalry! I know I wasn't that harsh to my brother.

But God works through and in even our most deceptive moments. Jacob, the weakling, goes on to carry on the line of his grandfather, Abraham. Jacob is the one who wrestles with God in the desert. Jacob sees the angels. And, in the end, it is Jacob who fathers what becomes the twelve tribes of Israel.

And the rivalry he has with his brother? Well, God has things work out for good there too. After all, you can't be angry with your brother forever!

So if you are blessed to have siblings, rejoice! Rejoice with them in their triumphs and struggles. Rejoice in all the rivalries you use to have. Rejoice that God has given you the wonderful gift of brothers and sisters. (And if you never had siblings...well rejoice as well! For you never had to deal with any of the rivalry mess we had!)

Rejoice and ponder all that God has done, and will do, with the relationships you were born into.

Heavenly Father, we are connected to our siblings, those in blood and those in faith. Inspire in us your grace that we might see your hand at work, even in the midst of our rivalries, through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Nature or Nurture?

"Two nations are in your womb, and two peoples from within you will be separated;
one people will be stronger than the other, and the older will serve the younger." Genesis 25:23

Nature or Nurture?
By Rev. William Dohle

There are some things of life I just don't understand.

I don't understand how three kids, born of the same parents, can be so very different.
I don't understand how in a family of four children, one can grow up to be a pastor, one can go back to her roots, one is kinda wandering, and the other has abandoned faith altogether.
I don't understand how a strict catholic man could produce three children who represent three very different religious viewpoints.

I just don't understand.

I have long followed the whole nature or nurture debate. The question being: Which controls your destiny more? How you were born? Or how you grew up? That question has always fascinated me, for behind it lies the underlying question of who's responsible for our actions? Do we really choose our own destiny? Or is it handed to us on a clay or silver platter?

Think of your own family, how different you are from your siblings, your parents, your aunts and uncles? Were these differences all written out before you were born? Or did you choose? And if you did choose, when was the choice made for this road in your life? Is your destiny somehow written in your genes? Or do you make your own destiny based on your decisions?

The Bible gives contrary arguments to the whole notion of free will. Take the story of Jacob and Esau. These twin brothers really had no choice in their destiny. Before they were born, they were already jostling each other within their mother. When their mother asked the Lord, why this was happening, the Lord said to Rebekah:

"Two nations are in your womb, and two people from within you will be separated; one people will be stronger than the other, and the older will serve the younger."

Did these brothers have a choice in the matter? Did they choose their destiny? Did Jacob stand up and volunteer to be the younger one? No! Of course not! Their choice was made for them. And that decision controlled their destiny. Even their names said something about who they would be. Esau's name means "hairy" because he was so very hairy as a kid, while Jacob is said to have come out holding onto Esau's heel(which in ancient times meant he would be a deceiver.).

It would seem the Bible comes on the side of nature in this debate...except that somewhere down the road for Jacob and Esau, things change. The brothers, who start out hating each other, reconcile and love each other in the end. Their destiny, which seems to tear them apart, is overridden by their own decisions to love and forgive each other.

We too can rise above our upbringing. We may not be able to control our nature, but we can control our attitude toward it. We may not understand how one person sees things differently than we do, but we can rise above our prejudice and love them! We may not know why people are different, but we can love them for their differences. We can support them in their choices. We can show interest in what they are doing and how they are doing it.

And whatever is at work within us, be it our nature or the way we were brought up, we know this. "...God is greater than our hearts and he knows everything."(1 John 3:20). May God the Father, who created us, sustain us throughout our lives. May Christ forgive us for when we stumble. And may the Spirit be at work in us, transforming our minds and hearts that we might rise above both our nature and our nurture in service to our neighbors.

Heavenly Father, you created us to be your people and in Christ you have claimed us as your own. Transform us that we might be servants to others, for the sake of Christ our Lord. Amen.

Love at First Sight

"Issac went out into the field one evening to meditate and when he looked up, he saw the camels[that Rebekah was riding] approaching. Rebekah also looked up and saw Isaac...and asked the servant, "Who is the man in the field coming to meet us?" Genesis 24:63-65

Love at First Sight
By Rev. William Dohle

They meet one day in a crowded room. People milling about them. The boy looks up, just as the girl glances his way. Their eyes meet. And love blossoms. Years later they tell their grandkids, "I was in love the first time I saw her!"

There is a dream in every young heart of this scenario happening to them. Books are written of it. Movies made from it. Songs sung to it.

The possibility and promise of love at first sight grips many a romantic heart. The thought that from the first time they meet, love will blossom between them.

There are few stories of love at first sight in the Bible given its culture and the way men and women were given in marriage back then. But there is one. That story, taken from the pages of Genesis, tells us how Isaac and Rebekah first met. It tells of a journey made by Isaac's servants back to Abraham's homeland. Of a young woman who meets the servant at the well and the incredible leap of faith she made in traveling with him back to Isaac's home. It tells of her arrival and both her and Isaac's reaction to each other. It is the best example of romantic love we can find in the pages of Scripture.

But as romantic and wonderful as this story is, there is another side to this story as well. When we take these characters, not as Rebekah and Isaac, but as us and God, seeing their reaction to each other as God's reaction to us as we approach him.

Much has been said of the love of God, but I wonder if we fathom just how passionate God truly loves us. You see, God fell in love with us at first sight.

God tells Jeremiah: "Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you, before you were born I set you apart."(Jer. 1:5)

If this verse applies to us as well(as I believe it does) God knew us too before he formed us in the womb. At first sight, God fell in love with us.

But that's not where God's love ended, though. God didn't just love us from afar. He wanted to be close to us.

So he sent Jesus through whom God "...raised us up with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus, in order that in the coming ages he might show the incomparable riches of his grace, expressed in his kindness to us in Christ Jesus."(Eph. 2:6-7)

So God, not satisfied with ever being apart from us, decided to come down and abide with us from now until the time when heaven and earth will come together in his heavenly kingdom.

This good news is nothing short of a romantic love story. A love story where the lover(God) sacrifices everything to be near the beloved(us).

And the best part of this love story is that it's true! And it's for you! And me!

The thing about love at first sight is... it doesn't look at flaws. There is no list of right and wrong for first sight love. No way to earn it...or turn it away. It doesn't love because the beloved did anything special for it either or earned it in any way. It simply...is! That is the love God has for us!

And no matter how romantic we are in this life. No matter how we have(or have not) experienced the grace and love of God in relationships with others, we have this love given freely to us by God. A love that started at first sight and continues through the end of time itself.

Heavenly Father, you love and care for me more than I can possibly imagine. Allow me to take a piece of the love you have for me and share it with my brothers and sisters here on earth, through Christ our Lord. Amen.